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The Debt of Being Understanding
Being understanding is usually a good thing. Someone disappoints you, and you start thinking about why they did it. You explain it away: they’re under pressure, they had a difficult childhood, or they struggle to communicate. Those explanations may be valid, but they still don’t answer whether you want to
August 23, 2026 by Gbenga Samuel Wemimo -
The Debt of Keeping Your Emotional Options Open
Some debts come from refusing to close a door. You left a job years ago, but you still think about how your life might have turned out if you had stayed. You ended a relationship and still wonder whether different circumstances would have changed the outcome. You may tell yourself
August 23, 2026 by Gbenga Samuel Wemimo -
The Debt of Being the Reasonable One
Being the reasonable person feels like a strength. You listen, see both sides, compromise, and try not to make every disagreement personal. These are valuable qualities. They become costly when you are always the person expected to use them. You understand the other person’s position, so you give in.
August 23, 2026 by Gbenga Samuel Wemimo -
The Debt of Remembering Everything
A good memory helps you learn. You remember who kept their word, who disappointed you, and what happened the last time you trusted someone. Someone who hurt you years ago may have changed. The relationship may have changed. You may have changed. Yet one mistake today can bring the entire
August 23, 2026 by Gbenga Samuel Wemimo -
The Debt of Emotional Consistency
We value consistency so much that changing our minds can feel like failure. You chose a career years ago. Your interests, priorities, and circumstances have changed. Still, leaving can feel like admitting you wasted those years, so you choose to stay. This happens with beliefs, relationships, goals, and even the
August 23, 2026 by Gbenga Samuel Wemimo -
The Debt of Being the Person Who Understands Everyone
People often come to you with their problems because you listen well. You know who is struggling at work, whose marriage is difficult, who is worried about a parent, and who is trying to make a major decision. Being trusted feels good. The problem starts when being the person people
August 23, 2026 by Gbenga Samuel Wemimo