(Isaiah 63:5)
One very common thing I notice in people is the lack of trust in their own judgment. They don’t seem to believe they are competent enough to take decisions for themselves.
I was in a friend’s house some months ago. His 15-year-old son wanted to go play football with his friends on a nearby field and he asked me which color of stockings to wear- the black or the white?
I wondered why he asked ME. I wondered why he felt the need to ask ANYBODY. YOU can decide which pair to wear, son!
The issue here is, he had not been TAUGHT to TRUST his own judgment.
I can excuse him: he is just a kid.
But there are ADULTS who behave like him- they downplay their own capacity to take decisions about their own issues. And some don’t even have the capacity AT ALL- but they are unaware.
I get asked questions very often, I ask people questions more often. My conclusion is, a lot of people can’t think independently: they need Third Parties to validate decisions for them.
I once asked an ADULT a simple math question: what is 7 multiplied by 3? She kept looking at me. She didn’t know what to say. Now, I knew she knew the answer, but for whatever reason, she was a bit confused!
Why?
The question was SIMPLE! And somehow, she believed there must be a catch in it somewhere.
She said as much when I told her the answer: 21. “Uncle Harry, I thought there was MORE to the question and I didn’t want to look STUPID if I replied the answer was 21”! Overthinking at its worst…
We have not been wired to maximize our brains or trust our own intelligence, we think other people are smarter than us, especially if they occupy a “Superior” Office or carry an “Important” Title.
I often hear people say “I thought it was only ME”. People say this when they have opinions on issues but didn’t trust their judgment enough to say them out publicly- until someone else says them.
Look at that verse in the Book of Isaiah. The Person in that discussion trusted His own decisions! He said, “MY OWN ARM BROUGHT SALVATION TO ME…” He didn’t need any validation from Third Parties.
When my Daughter was born, I dedicated her to God MYSELF: I didn’t bother taking her to any Church for dedication.
Why?
Because I KNEW I was ENOUGH!
The irony was, a lot of Church folks were upset with me for dedicating my own child. One said, “I pity that poor girl! If anything happens to her, I hope you know there’s nobody else to blame but yourself!” Another said, “What POWER do you have to dedicate your daughter?”
It was that RIDICULOUS.
I have heard people argue on different sides of a topic- religious, political, etc. most people in such positions don’t really THINK- they simply run with their biases.
A woman once condemned me for the Tattoo on my arm.
Why?
She quoted a Scripture: “You shall not make any cuttings in your flesh for the dead, nor tattoo any marks on you: I am the Lord.”- Leviticus 19:28
Fair enough.
Now, the preceding verse says, “You shall not shave around the sides of your head, nor shall you disfigure the edges of your beard.”
Her husband who stood at her side was clean-shaven. I told her to turn 90 degrees and face her husband- and accuse him of breaking the Law (Verse 27) as she accused me of breaking the Law (Verse 28).
Of course, she couldn’t.
A young man called me some days ago. He hangs out with his friends (6 of them, including him) once in a while. He said, “when we hang out, I realize I am almost always of a different opinion on issues with them. When I voice my opinion, they all gang up against me! Now, I’m beginning to think maybe the problem is ME. There must be something WRONG with how I process things!”
I had to take time to convince him there was nothing wrong with HIM: his friends were the ones with a problem with their processor, not him- the majority could be WRONG!
Daniel decided NOT to eat the food given them in Babylon. 3 people joined him, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. They were in the minority, but they were RIGHT, the majority was WRONG! If Daniel needed validation from Third Parties, he wouldn’t have stood out on his conviction.
YOUR Judgment is RIGHT!
YOUR Opinion is VALID!
YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!
Don’t let anyone gaslight you to think you have a problem with your take on ANYTHING! Learn to trust YOUR Brain, YOUR Instincts, YOUR Opinion, YOUR Judgment!
REFUSE to outsource your mind, your senses, your capacity to THINK to Third Parties: they are NOT smarter than you, no matter their Status in Life or the Religious Title they carry or the Religious Robes they wear.
YOU HAVE THE MIND OF CHRIST!
YOUR OWN ARM WILL BRING SALVATION TO YOU!!!
YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!
Shalom,
Haruna Daniels