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I have a position and would like to seek other’s perspective on it as I don’t agree with the “universal position” on it. Communication: I completely disagree with the notion and perception that Women are better communicators and Men are poor communicators. The idea that a particular gender is poor/better at something is absurd to me because billions of people cannot just be “poor” at an essential element of life. The first question would be “better/poor in comparison to whom?” Why is one gender the basis or reference point. Is it by the volume of words used or the ability to read emotional cues? Why should female communication be the reference point especially when more words and gestures are required? The second question is why then do men understand men perfectly if we are poor in communication? Why is it that we don’t miscommunicate at workplace, only in relationships and other informal setting requiring male/female interactions. The last question would be at what point does this inadequacy set in? Is it at puberty or from birth? This question is important because men were raised by both men and women so why was this not trained into boys from toddlers. If it is more of nature than nurture, why then should it be seen as a male problem? Do we see the same trend in our ministry/work/families? i.e. Men not communicating clearly.
GSW: Let me say first that the Logic of this discussion and the emotion of this discussion are two separate things. The first we can all write about. The second
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I think this is because women are more expressive than men. Even if men do the talking, it will probably be one or two sentences. But women will start from when they were hustling, when they bought land and blah blah blah
GSW: You get it. That is not an academic or research truth. That is a life truth. Marriage is not for everybody. I have said this over and over again.
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How do they deal with the loneliness? No matter what, every human needs companionship. It is how God designed us. They need to be a way to heal them.
GSW: Marriage does not cure loneliness sir. For chaotic folks, they feel alive when theydo things spontaneously and without any form of order. Wake up in a room, spend theday
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If they are believers, what should we do for them? They cant continue to live that way…
GSW: The Word of God changes us. There is nothing that reprograms us like the Scriptures. To be candid, and I mean brutally candid. There is more in every marriage,
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Men do not realize the point where their wives no longer “need” them. She gets to appoint where she gets all her validation from outside. Friendship from outside, cheerleaders from outside. A listening ear from outside. When a man gets to the point where he is no longer “needed”, it could well be over.
GSW: This applies to only poor men though. The way God instituted marriage, need goes in only one direction. Not both. It is in this modern times that we have
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Did that not come with the curse in the garden of Eden. We are free from that. We do not live to desire a man’s love.
GSW: No please. It was not a curse. God did not curse Adam or the woman. He cursed only the land. It was a reorientation of priorities. So that there
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A lot of men have no clue of how little an impact they are making in their wives lives. They simply assume that all is well at home once things are running smoothly. They underestimate the sacrifices a woman has made to make a home and often take her for granted. I know a lot of homes where the husband is simply clueless about his wife’s dreams or how her mind works or if she even wants more out of life. Some women simply get to the point where they are “done” and the man was oblivious all the while.
GSW: I ignored this earlier because it is not the right state of mind that anyone who is abeliever or two believers in a marriage should have. People marry now
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Are all the cases you come across believers sold out to living for Christ?
GSW: No please, that was why I didn’t want to give it vent. I didn’t want the problem to seem as if it does not have a solution already. If