I met this young man some years ago
Handsome to look at, articulate, and very confident
A Christian, a father of two children, and a husband
He and his wife were attending a church somewhere in FESTAC
The pastor controls their home; by that I mean, the pastor controls his wife
The wife worked with an NGO
The husband worked with a bank, but he was one of those young men who learnt how to play the keyboard as a young man, and he was very good at it
It was what his wife saw in him that made her invite him to her church
It was the same thing the pastor saw that made him offer to give him leadership of the church choir and paid employment as choir director
He took the job because the offer was juicy but also because his wife, who was then just an acquaintance, followed him up closely on the offer
She went above and beyond to convince him to take the job
It was the above-and-beyond effort of this woman that led to her getting pregnant and subsequently to their marriage.
After they got married, this man realised that this pastor was an idol his wife worshipped
She was one of those women who lacked the ability to think for themselves or make any major decisions or even the minor ones, without the input and blessing of their pastor
It got so bad that whenever he dared question anything the pastor said, his wife would give him the silent treatment until he apologised or promised never to slander a “Man of God” anymore.
Things became worse after he got the conviction to take up a job abroad
The offer came out of nowhere, and it was a multinational opportunity that included sponsorship and allowance for his wife and family to help them relocate from any nation of the world to Canada.
He saw this as the answer to all his prayers.
First, the job was an opportunity of a lifetime.
Second, the job will keep as much distance as possible between his wife and this pastor, whom he was sure she was not having any physical relationship with, but who had taken over her mind completely
Third, he had wanted to leave his position as the choir director of that church for some years, but his wife made it clear to him that once he leaves the position and the church, he should forget about his marriage and his children.
She said this to him without mincing words.
He loved his wife and children, and he had stayed in the church and swallowed as much as he could with humility because the consequences were too dire for him to consider.
When he told his wife about the job offer, she ran off to inform the pastor
The pastor said, “No!”
His wife returned home and told him that she would have gladly travelled with him, but her place of assignment was in that church, and she wouldn’t trade her divine destiny for all the riches in this world.
He accepted the job offer and filled out all the necessary documents
His wife told him he was wasting his time
It got so bad that he reported her to her parents and also got his own parents involved
His wife said he could leave, but she was not going anywhere
His wife’s mother told him to go and pray
“I have never seen my daughter in such a disagreeable state before. She must be under a spell; you are her husband. Go and pray. I will also pray. This is not ordinary.”
This was why the young man came to me.
He wanted me to pray with him that the scale in the eyes of his wife may fall off
I asked him if he still attended church on Sundays
He said yes
I asked him who the strongest female influence in the church was
He thought about it and mentioned a name
I said, “After service this Sunday, go and talk to this woman. Don’t accuse the pastor of any wrongdoing directly, just insinuate that you suspect he is sleeping with some church members, your wife included, and you would like him to stop, or you will go public.”
He did so.
That same day, the pastor, his wife, and this woman of influence visited their house
His wife couldn’t contain her joy
Her idol was visiting her home for the first time in many years
The pastor’s wife and the woman of influence watched her every move
As the husband, he stayed as aloof as possible.
His wife was all over the pastor
She couldn’t help herself; he was God to her
The next day, the pastor called his wife and encouraged her to take up the offer to travel abroad with her husband
When she protested, the pastor said, “God told him to tell her so.”
That was how the wife agreed to the move
Two months later, the family relocated to Canada, and this man was able to get his wife away from this pastor’s influence.
PS: You often wonder how some people got fanatical followers despite how silly whatever they were doing is.
You see some religious figures commanding a huge followership, and you wonder why…
Human beings are one of the easiest beings to domesticate. Some of the most brilliant minds are so gullible, easy to program and manipulate by dullards in the name of spiritual leadership
There’s a popular anecdote about Joseph Stalin that goes as follows.
One day, the dictator of the Soviet Union told his closest advisors that he would show them how easy it was to control a person who had already been subjugated. He brought in a live chicken, which he then proceeded to pluck until it was naked and bleeding.
“Now, watch where the chicken goes,” Stalin said as he put it on the ground. Finally freed from its torturer’s grasp, the chicken wasted no time getting away. However, when it failed to find an exit, it readily returned to Stalin and attempted to warm itself between the dictator’s legs. Stalin then took out some grain from his pocket, which he fed to the chicken.
Some people, under the guise of religious ability, would dispossess other human beings of their reasoning ability and feed them corn in return for their loyalty.
Such people usually have a big ego and a larger-than-life personality that can easily be punctured by three things
1) Rumour
2) Reputational Destruction and
3) Innuendo
While these three things are negative and must be seriously discouraged, the threat of them is always enough to scare a man who depends on his reputation to keep his myth into doing the right thing.
-GSW-