A Christian brother’s wife left him some months ago; he said she left because, according to her, “He was a stingy man”.

He said she had always been a happy and contented wife

She drove the latest vehicles, and they lived in a glass house

Her children were born in the countries where citizenship could be bought with money

Spending the summer abroad was the norm for his family, including shopping sprees

The school his children were attending was the best in the country where he was dwelling

They were enjoying the lifestyle of the one per cent

His wife was always full of prayers and gratitude to him for being a wonderful provider.

He bought her the latest cars for her birthday, credited her bank account with funds from time to time and even sponsored her abroad on several occasions for training that had to do with her career and personal grooming

So what changed?

He said they were having a discussion one morning, and he unwittingly showed her his account balance.

Obviously, he was quite rich, and his wife suddenly felt all the wonderful things he had been doing for her and the family were being done out of pocket change, while he kept the bulk of his money to himself.

How can my husband be worth this much in dollars, and he is giving us crumbs to live on and be grateful for?

Immediately after he revealed his financial worth to her, she announced that she had selected some private schools for her children in the USA to attend, and she insisted they must attend the schools or she would leave the marriage.

Then she began to feed her children with bile about their father, telling them how much he is worth and how everything he had been doing for them was not even costing him a fraction of a percentage of his wealth

Was he planning to spend the money in heaven? He is already in his fifties, and he is not opening the vaults and allowing her and the children to live a lifestyle worthy of his true worth as their father.

They were living the millionaire’s lifestyle when they ought to be living the billionaire’s lifestyle.

Delilah didn’t kill Samson until he divulged his secret to her, and she didn’t rest until she discovered his secret.

Delilah didn’t guess that Samson had a secret; she didn’t know that he had a secret by divination. Samson’s power may be abnormal, but it did not have to have a secret behind it.

He could have simply been a freak of nature.

It was Samson who demystified himself by hinting that he had a secret to share

It was Samson who felt that being vulnerable to a woman as a man is a gesture of true love

No woman will relent from knowing the secret to the mystery of her man; no man should ever give up the secret of his mystery.

Keep her guessing, keep her calculating, keep her wondering

If you tell her the secret, make sure you don’t tell her the whole truth. If you have funds in a hundred bank accounts, share the details of only two or three with her.

Unless you want to become Macbeth, the man who murdered sleep.

You have a duty to provide the best life you can afford for your family; you don’t have a duty to divulge to your wife and children how much you earn, your source of income, how much you have saved in the bank or how much you have invested.

She should know that she is safe and secure financially within the context of the marriage, and that should be enough.

The moment she starts crunching your numbers for you, whatever you have been doing in the past becomes dust. Her budget increases to fit the number she is crunching. If you say, “I am not increasing your budget,” you become the stingy man, and if you increase her budget, “You become the tyrant whom she had to fight with in order to get what she deserved”.

Save yourself the trouble and provide for your family to the best of your ability, but do so without diminishing yourself and your source as a man.

Another Pastor’s wife left him.

He was a rich man who made money early and married her out of the abundance of his wealth

After the marriage, she convinced him to add her email address to his bank accounts so that whenever he received cash inflow, she was able to see what was coming in at that time

As soon as money came in, she would plan a trip to the US or the UK or Europe for her annual shopping. She shopped twice a year “abroad”.

He bought and registered the cars in her name and also bought houses in her name. He was love-smitten, and he was determined to show her how committed and transparent he was willing to be in the name of love.

A lean season came for him, and inflows stopped coming. He began to sell some of his properties to feed and meet his family obligations.

She had placed the children in certain schools where the school fees were on the very high side

They were members of clubs where annual subscription fees were quite heavy

She saw that the inflow was not as before, but she was unwilling to cut down on the trips and the lifestyle

She encouraged him to sell his properties to maintain a lifestyle that was not only extravagant but pretentious.

This went on for three years.

Suddenly, he was broke and out of resources to sell

She left with her children

After her departure, he suddenly came into some money, and she told him she was still open to reconciliation, but she refused to compromise on her twice-a-year foreign trips and shopping allowance

She also refused to compromise on his duty to provide her with a lavish lifestyle

A lifestyle she was not providing for herself but that she believed she must be given by any man who calls himself her husband.

A man is not rich unless he is living on only a fraction of his income.

If you are earning one thousand dollars a month and spending two thousand dollars a month, you may look good and drive a good car and eat well at the moment, but you are a very poor man.

A rich man earns the equivalent of one thousand dollars a month and spends less than one hundred dollars a month to meet all his needs and those of his family.

The rest of the money is invested and must stay invested as new income flows in, and the lifestyle remains frugal while the investment takes the bulk of his income.

If he kept this up for ten years and remained consistent with this lifestyle, he would have enough to live on two hundred dollars a month, and that is a hundred per cent increase in lifestyle value based on his income and investments.

It is better to have money invested and live frugally than to live lavishly while running on fumes.

The moment a man tells his wife he is broke, he loses all respect, and her thinking moves from security to survival.

While in survival mode, the thinking is always “every man for himself”.

The man is held accountable for going broke and being unable to keep his family together

The woman becomes the victim of the man’s inability to manage his resources and provide for his household.

It is the man’s responsibility to ensure that he keeps his family’s finances in the black at all times

If a lavish lifestyle will destroy the family’s finances, it is his duty to tell his wife off if she has a taste that he is unable to satisfy.

No man should have to continuously buy the respect and love of his woman with gifts, trips, and thrills.

If after you have married her, it is still for sale, then you have married someone else’s wife.

It is wiser to have bread to eat for a hundred days than chocolate to eat for one day.

When a man does not understand how to hold the line of mystery, he will lose both the tangible and intangible blessings of his marriage.

There are families and marriages for which what has been written above is not fit.

You know your family and how it operates

If you are a low-income household where both the husband and the wife are working hard to pay the bills, your currency of trust and respect as a man is transparency and forthrightness

Keeping a penny for yourself when your wife is remitting all is unfair.

If you are a rich man and she is a trophy wife, know this and know peace: your relationship is transactional, and it will last for as long as you remain liquid and able to provide.

If you empower her to finish all your resources in one day, she will be gone the next day

So it will be very wise of you to keep your resources flowing in and limit your expenditure in such a manner that she will still be around and available when you die and hand over the rest to her and the children.

A man who is unable to provide for his family is worse than an infidel – Apostle Paul

-GSW-